Sunday, January 6, 2008

Sunday's Ideas

  • I think the phrase "He shoots, he scores!" is in the wrong order.
  • I try to live in the past. Housing prices were cheaper.
  • I won't say which brand, but I noticed a certain pop is advertising "Authentic blend of 23 flavours". Now I don't know about you, but aren't all blends authentic? Can you have a fake blend? Secondly, IT'S POP! What blend of flavours are we talking about? This ain't KFC. It's pop! It's sugar, water, and a couple more heaping tablespoons of sugar.
  • "And so the plot thickens..." I like to use potato starch to thicken the plot. It's healthy and Kosher for Passover.
  • How many times has someone said to you they're a "little iffy". I have yet to see someone be more than a little. Has anyone been a LOT iffy? Maybe it's about time.
  • You eat corn on the cob. Chew it thoroughly. Yet somehow it comes out whole again on the other side. How does that happen? Nevermind, I don't want to know.
  • Good news: I stopped biting my nails.
    Bad news: I started biting other people's nails. You think they'll notice?
  • How do you get soy milk? The last time I checked, soy doesn't have nipples.
  • An apple a day keeps the doctor away. I don't actually eat the apple -- I just throw it at the doctor. I pegged him once with a granny smith. Damn, my doctor is slow!

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